DES MOINES, Wash. — A man is in hot water for allegedly dressing up in a ridiculous costume in an attempt to impersonate another man and steal his debit card. According to court documents, Joshua K. Pinney, 30, walked into the Bank of America branch in Des Moines, Wash. on June 26 dressed in the outfit pictured here. The bank’s branch manager immediately determined the costume was fake and called police. Prosecutors say Pinney presented the identification of an Oregon man to the bank manager and asked for a new debit card. The actual man on the ID was a client at the bank whose car had recently been stolen and his identification was missing. The victim had flagged his account to prevent anyone from using it.
Hey Joshua listen up man. Pay attention. I know you’re down and out right now. I know you’re in the dumps. Sitting in jail with a neck brace on grey dye all over your face and like paper towels and pillows duct taped to your head. Probably thinking you’re the worst ID thief ever. But keep your head up. Michael Jordan missed more than 9,000 shots in his career. He lost almost 300 games. 26 times he’s been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. He’s failed over and over and over again in his life. And that is why he succeeds. Just remember that. Don’t give up on your dreams of stealing identities and getting debit cards just because of this one little hiccup. Just post bail and come back stronger than ever.