Barstool Sports

Greus said he had a small bag of cocaine in it and handed it to a deputy. A search of Thomson found a plastic baggie located in her bra that contained morphine and hydromorphine pills. Clancey said she had a hydromorphine pill in her wallet left on the driver’s seat. While searching Acquarelli, Clancey jumped in the tan Hyundai, grabbed her wallet, quickly pulled out a pill and swallowed it. Deputies attempted to stop her from swallowing but were unsuccessful.

Deputies also found five hypodermic needles containing a clear liquid that tested positive for opiates. Clancey said the needles were hers and she used them to shoot opiates. Clancey also told deputies she had another hypodermic needle hidden in her butt; she was removed from the patrol car and produced a needle from her backside and gave it to the deputy.

I get that you don’t want to keep all your eggs in one basket but come on.  Things are getting a little nuts when you got needles in your assholes and coke in your prostheses.  Seriously the crazy part about this story isn’t the guy hiding blow in his peg leg. It’s that there are drugs literally allllll over this car. Why did you bother with the great hiding places? Prosthetic legs. Needles up the butthole. Tricky stuff. Pick one, maybe pick two, just at least get them all hidden.  Jesus.   Not only are they messy, they’re absolute shit under pressure. You don’t even have to hide the drugs if you’re just gonna tell the cops about your secret hidey holes the second you get questioned. Might as well have been blowing it off the dash if you’re gonna crack the second a cop taps on your leg and asks if it’s hollow.

P.S. I’m getting the impression that the needle up the butt was all a practical joke. Like they convinced the chick to do it when she was fucked up and just laughed and laughed. Honestly, what was the point?  There’s a gigantic baggie of morphine by the stick shift honey.  That one hypodermic needle jammed in your rectum isn’t going to make or break you.