Horseballs, poop cake and really great discount chaise lounges, that’s what Ikea does
ABC — Chinese authorities say they have destroyed nearly two tons of chocolate cake imported by Sweden’s Ikea for violating food quality standards. The Shanghai quarantine bureau said this week that Kraft cream cheese and 2.7 tons of Nestle chocolate bars also were among dozens of imported products destroyed in its latest round of quality inspections. Chinese authorities have stepped up food inspections in recent years after a series of scandals over fake or shoddy goods. The Shanghai quarantine bureau said it destroyed 1,872 kilos (4,100 pounds) of chocolate almond cake imported by Ikea that it said had excessive levels of coliform bacteria. The cake made by a Swedish supplier is sold in Ikea stores in a majority of the countries where it operates. Magnusson said the company is looking into whether the cake should be withdrawn from sale elsewhere.
Look Ikea, I was kind of on your side after the whole horsemeat thing. You’re a furniture store. Nobody should expect five star cuisine from you or even real meat for that matter. But when the Chinese start complaining about the “food” you’re pedaling, something’s gotta give. This is a country where it’s almost impossible to own a dog for more than a few weeks without him ending up in Mr. Wong’s House of Noodle’s pad thai. Seriously you just got turned down by the grossest food country among first world countries. That’s like getting shut down by the sluttiest, fattest, drunkest girl at the party with literally zero inhibitions or standards after everybody else went home. You’re gross IKEA. You’re gross and nobody wants to sleep with you.