Guardian – A Brazilian judoka accidentally broke his Olympic bronze medal when he brought it into the shower with him but will be given a new medal by the International Olympic Committee, according to Globoesporte.com. Felipe Kitadai said he was carrying the medal everywhere, but when he took it with him to the shower as a joke, he dropped it while trying to keep it from getting wet. Kitadai said that the part holding the medal’s string broke, and now he cannot wear it around his neck. He said there is also a small dent on the medal. “I took it with me everywhere,” said Kitadai. “I even took it into the shower, but I was afraid to get it wet so put it in my mouth while I soaped myself. But it ended up slipping.”
I get why you would be proud to win an Olympic medal. It’s one of the ultimate honors an athlete in a sport no one cares about can receive. It’s not even a real medal. It’s a fucking alloy. If I spent four years of my life training for Olympic judo and didn’t even make it to the gold medal match I wouldn’t even bother with the bronze medal. I’d just stand on the mat during the loser’s bout and hope that my opponent channels his inner Sub-Zero and physically tears my spine out of my body.
PS- You brought it into the shower as “a joke?” At least tell us it’s because you were banging some incredible Brazilian smoke who couldn’t resist your bronze medal in judo.


















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