SOX OFFENDERS

Finally. The drudgery and boredom of the off-season has ended. Time to climb out of the cave, shake the winter rust off, and get ready for some baseball. It seems like we’ve been hearing about the Mitchell Report, Johan Santana and Roger’s ass since Carter was in office. And we’ll still hear about it, but now we can blissfully ignore it and start paying attention to actual players throwing baseballs and swinging bats down in sunny Florida. Things have changed a bit with a certain shoulder injury, but let’s take a look at the five guys that will be taking the hill for the Red Sox. While we’re at it, we’ll take a glance at how our predictions panned out from last year’s pre-season article.

Josh Beckett: The Ace

Without a doubt, the torch was passed last season. Josh Beckett stepped up and made this team his own. He started his own business of ass-kicking, and business was good. Now, we don’t like to blow our own horns, but check out Red’s pseudo-prediction from last year’s pre-season article:

But if there's one guy who seems poised for a big year -- and I mean a big, "who the hell is this guy and what have those scientists who work the lab buried 500 miles under Fenway been injecting him with?" kind of year -- it's Beckett. With the spotlight on Matsuzaka and Schilling and one year of the AL under his belt, I'm betting the guy will not only regain his form, but dig deeper to prove that Theo wasn't on peyote when he gambled away a good chunk of our future to land him.

If nothing else, it's important to remember that this is a guy who's nailed Leeann Tweeden. That commands respect.

Yeah, that’s our Beckett.

Daisuke Matsuzaka: Year Two

The Diceman cometh, my friends. I’ve got high hopes for this dude after a year adjusting to American baseball…and America. Take a look at Josh Beckett’s second season in the AL. Yeah, what if? And here is what I said last year:

If this guy doesn’t win 30 games, break the strikeout record, and find a cure for the common cold, a lot of people are going to look at this as a disappointment. From what I’ve seen, the Dice Man can pitch. But he’s not a superhero. He’s just a guy. I’m looking for 16 wins, a sub-four ERA, and a lot of entertainment out of this man.   

 Dice finished 15-12 with an ERA of 4.40. And man, we got some entertainment, didn’t we? I think the adjustment has been made both in terms of pitching and lifestyle. Case in point, he’s rocking a mullet!

Jon Lester: The Comeback

After everything Lester went through last off-season, you know, beating cancer and all, you had to root for him. This off-season was no bargain for him either, spending most of the winter wondering if he would be wearing a Red Sox uniform or be part of the Johan deal. The dust has settled and Lester is your number three starter.

Lester made just 11 starts last season, not joining the rotation until the end of July. He finished with a 4.47 ERA and struck out 50 batters in his 63 innings. He showed flashes of what could be, three times going seven innings and giving up three earned runs or less. He also had three starts where he didn’t get past four innings and gave up five runs. So what does it mean? I think 2008 will answer that question. His recovery timeline was extremely short, and you’ve gotta think a whole year of healing is going to make a huge difference. I want 15 wins. 

Tim Wakefield: Still ‘Da Man

I think I’ll just reprint last year’s story in entirety:

Wake is the guy, that’s all you need to know. Need a starter? Call Wake. Need a closer? Call Wake. Need middle relief, a ride to the airport, a kidney? Wake’s your guy. The man brings it every day. Granted, sometimes “it” is 5 runs in 4 innings when the old knuckler isn’t knuckling, but “it” could also be 8 shut-out innings just when the bullpen is depleted, and a lot of silly swings from the opposition.

In addition to his tireless on-field performance, Wake is also the guy you want representing your club off the field. He’s a staple at the Jimmy Fund visiting the kids. But what separates him from the players you see on the news occasionally is that he does it for the kids, not the cameras. Giving him the lifetime contract was genius. He’s a guy you want around. I’ve got him penciled in for 15 wins.

Wake finished 17-12, but was really tearing it up mid-season. At one point he was 16-10 with a 4.16 ERA and was routinely tossing 7+ innings. He is ageless, folks, all we need are 14 wins.

Clay Buchholz: Mr. No-Hitter

 Injury is a part of the game. History has proven that one man’s injury is another man’s opportunity. Remember Wade Boggs? He only got a chance because of Lansford going down with an injury. Tom Brady? Yeah. So maybe Schill getting hurt is going to be the lighting of the Clay Buchholz fuse. The kid has shown he can pitch – in the form of a no-hitter last season. He’s added 10 pounds of muscle to his thin frame, and this is his shot. Based on the success of the other kids that have come up through the organization, why think Clay will be anything short of brilliant?

There’s your starting five, Red Sox Nation. Any problem, Julian Tavarez, aka Batshit, toes the rubber. And that can’t be a bad thing, can it? Play ball. 

Find more of Red & Denton’s uninformed commentary at www.survivinggrady.com.