SOX OFFENDERS
Well, haven’t we been busy early in the off-season? We’ve ordered our 2007 World Series DVD collection. We’ve stocked up on cheap beer and Funyuns for the winter. And of course, we almost put ourselves into a turkey-and-Schlitz-induced coma on Thanksgiving. Time for a moment of clarity…relatively speaking, of course. Let’s take a look back at some of the predictions we made for the 2007 season and see if we got any right, or even close. I can scratch the “Rachel McAdams will be my personal trainer” off the list, that one didn’t pan out. Again. This week we’ll review our “expert” pre-season analysis of the starters for the Sox.
Curt Schilling: The Ace
“I think he could win 20 this year, be a Cy Young candidate, and make the Sox will wish they had him for a mere 13M in ’08.”
OK, we were a little off on this one. Schill only started 24 games and won just nine of them. His ERA was a very respectable 3.87 which didn’t really make him a Cy Young contender. And the Sox ended up getting him cheaper. 0-for-one.
Daisuke Matsuzaka: The Hope
“And I think he’s the type of guy that can do all of that. I’m looking for 16 wins, a sub-four ERA, and a lot of entertainment out of this man.”
The Dice Man finished 15-12 with a 4.40 ERA. And I would say Red Sox Nation got a fair amount of entertainment out of the guy. Close enough, I’m calling it a victory.
Josh Beckett: The Comeback
“But if there's one guy who seems poised for a big year -- and I mean a big, ‘who the hell is this guy and what have those scientists who work the lab buried 500 miles under Fenway been injecting him with?’ kind of year -- it's Beckett. With the spotlight on Matsuzaka and Schilling and one year of the AL under his belt, I'm betting the guy will not only regain his form, but dig deeper to prove that Theo wasn't on peyote when he gambled away a good chunk of our future to land him.”
Give that man a cigar, we have a winner. Twenty wins? Just the tip of the iceberg in Beckett’s monster season. Post-season? 4-0 with a 1.2 ERA. 35 K’s with just two walks in 30 innings. Could have been World Series MVP if he got to pitch a second game. Probably should have been Cy Young winner. The comeback, indeed.
Jon Papelbon: Pitcher Reinvented
“Papelbon will make the transition from super-closer to hopefully-just-as-super starter.
What I mean is; Red and Denton think he’s got what it takes. Look for 17 wins, 79 fist pumps and 4 or 5 mound charges by pissed-off strikeout victims.”
Hey, we have to call “shenanigans” on this one. We were told Paps would be starter. But I think we got the fist-pumps right.
Tim Wakefield: ‘Da Man
“He’s a guy you want around. I’ve got him penciled in for 15 wins.”
No doubt Wake exceeded everyone’s expectations. Until he went down with a back, there were actually whispers about Cy Young votes. He was 16-10 with a 4.16 ERA at the end of August. Then he skipped a start and became “Shaky Wake” finishing 17-12 with a 4.76 ERA. But we’ll take that every year, won’t we?
Jon Lester: The Inspiration
“Wherever he ends up this year, in whatever role, Lester will be considered a success.”
Dead on with this one, fans. The Sox were very careful with Lester and used him sparingly. But when it was time to strap ‘em on and pitch, Lester was there. The clinching game of the World Series, for example? Lester should be a staple in the starting five next year, along with Schill, Beckett, Dice-K and Wake.
That’s it for now, folks. Not bad for a couple of ex-cons, eh? Of course, you’ll have to take our word that what we put in quotes above is actually what we said. ‘Cause I’m sure if you save anything from old Barstool issues, it ain’t our article!
Find more of Red & Denton’s drivel at www.survivinggrady.com.