From Her Perspective

Ah, the beginning.  All of you old married couples and serious relationshippers remember when you first met your significant other.  There were sparks, then fireworks, and then you realized that you wanted to spend as much if not more time with him/her than your PlayStation.  The beginning is what all of the movies are about, what we all strive to have.  Let’s talk about some great things that happen at the start of a relationship.

It’s okay to be annoying.  After a certain amount of time, intolerable, schmoopy behavior is unacceptable outside of the confines of your home or other private area.  But when you first meet someone, your friends definitely cut you some slack in terms of baby-talk, pet names, and phone conversations that end with “You hang up!  No, you hang up!”  This type of behavior is always revolting, of course, but at the beginning of a relationship, sometimes you just can’t help it.  You are so enamored of this person that you are incapable of not acting like a donkey.  Try to limit this behavior as much as possible, though.  Too much of it and people are going to start to hate you.

New sex.  During the first few months of a relationship, there is very little sleeping going on and lots and lots of boning.  Getting to know one another in this area can be a little scary at first, but figuring out what one another likes and doesn’t like is fun.  You may not have the best sex ever right away, but it is a lot of fun to try.  The added bonus here is that you don’t know each other well enough to feel comfortable about being selfish and lazy, so you end up getting much more time “down there” and a much better response.  Nobody wants to look like they don’t appreciate or aren’t enjoying what’s going on.

Flirting.  I should begin by saying that flirting should actually never stop happening in a relationship.  When it does, that means that the romance is gone and perhaps you should start looking for someone new.  My grandparents never stopped flirting, and they were married for well over fifty years.  But when you first meet someone and you’re not entirely sure about where you stand, it’s so much fun to bat your eyes and tease one another because usually the sexual tension is so crazy that you pretty much can’t help yourself. 

Making an effort.  After a few years, it’s less important to wear your least-wrinkly polo shirt and cleanest jeans when hanging out with your girlfriend.  But at the beginning, she always wears makeup and straightens her hair.  You even wear cologne.  You want to be impressive, put your best foot forward.  Most girls think it is fun to dress up for a guy, because they know it will be appreciated.  And girls love when guys make an effort for them, too.  Soon enough the sweats and boxer shorts will be the daily uniform, so it’s fun at the beginning to try to look good.

Saying “I love you”.  This is probably the best part for girls.  Before the L word makes its way into the equation, there is this sense of excitement.  You know it’s coming at some point, but you don’t know when (obviously, I am in the camp that thinks it’s the guy’s responsibility to say it first).  If you’re very lucky, she has been rolling it around in her mouth, too, waiting for the right moment to say it back.  Once you say “I love you”, you start doing things like looking each other in the eye during sex, and she may even allow you to do that thing that she said she’d never let you do except on holidays and birthdays a bit more often. 

All parts of a relationship are equally important and interesting.  With time, love grows deeper, connections become more solid, all that crap, which is really important.  But at the beginning there is this amazing giddy feeling, like when summer turns into fall or when Christmas songs start playing on the radio.  There’s nothing more thrilling than the start of something that could be great, and I hope you all either have that now or find that very soon.