From Her Perspective

We have had our first snowstorm.  We have been frozen for weeks now.  There is nary a flip flop or short skirt in sight.  What the hell are we supposed to do for the next two months?  There is only so much takeout a person can handle, so many layers a person can pile on, so much drinking cherry vodka and Coke in her bed while watching Lifetime movies in pajamas one can tolerate.  Um, I mean, other people do that, definitely not me.  But anyway, really, I am so sick of this horrible weather that it’s really putting me in a bad mood.  But nobody really wants to hear me bitch so let’s put a more positive spin on things.  Here’s what I’m most excited for this spring and summer…

That warm week.  You all know what I am talking about.  In a few weeks, we are going to have an insanely warm week that will trick us into putting away our disgusting salt-stained boots.  We will all think that winter is finally over and that we are finally going to start shaving our legs again.  I mean, um, girls are hairless and perfect and never have to shave, wax or pluck.  Of course, after said week the temperatures dip to freezing and everyone goes back to hating each other and life in general, but that little week is usually what gets us through the last dregs of ice and snow before the real nice weather comes in.

Sunroofs.  Okay, fine, I don’t have a sunroof.  I drive an old Corolla with one rim and while it is awesome, it is not exactly well-equipped.  Ha, well-equipped.  So when it gets nice out, there is nothing better than driving around, music blasting, all of the windows down and singing at the top of your lungs.  I can only do this when I am all by myself, as I was never one of those kids in Select Chorus, because I have the worst voice ever.  But it’s still fun.  My greatest hits include “Just a Friend” and “Ignition Remix.”  What?!

Sitting outside at the bar.  We definitely don’t have an overabundance of bars with patios and decks - mostly because we can only use them a few months out of the year, so when it’s finally warm enough to use them, it’s sort of the best thing ever.  My personal favorite is CitySide (I think that they received approximately 85% of my paycheck each week between 2002 and 2006), but you all probably have that summer place that you love to go and relax after work or on a hot afternoon.  Now my mouth is watering for Strawberry Blonde.  Mmm… beer…

Stopping at Dunkin Donuts (or 7-11, or wherever you go), to get snacks before a trip to the beach.  I love stopping at the convenience store and buying ten thousand magazines and Gatorade and Cheez Balls (come on, you know they’re a can of delicious) before sitting in traffic for ten thousand years.  There is something about filling up a cooler with ice and beer and soda you probably won’t drink that is quintessentially summer and no matter how old you are, it’s always a good feeling.

Going out after a day at the beach.  Your skin is all salty and your cheeks are sunburned and you still probably smell a little bit like sunscreen.  For some reason, this combination is equivalent to Spanish fly or a man in uniform.  Hooking up in the summer is way more fun than hooking up in the fall, because everyone looks better with a tan.  And a sundress.  Unless you are a dude.  God, I’m really on fire this week, huh?  It’s also too hot to wear underwear, so it’s much less work to get in someone’s pants. 

There are probably a billion other awesome things about the coming seasons (Red Sox, concerts, weddings, etc.), but my brain is too cold to think of anymore.  So hopefully we can struggle through the final weeks of winter, and maybe by the time you read this, the temperature will actually be in the balmy mid-forties.  Well, a girl can dream, anyway… stay warm!