Boston Dirt Dogs Needs To Be Put Out Of Its Misery
My name is Mike Lindall and I'm back.
I used to write for Barstool Sports back in the day. Back before all the hot chicks, back before all the parties, back before any website that people actually visited existed.
Then I left.
And these guys got soft.
There's no more anger. No more hatred. No more pissing and moaning and complaining. They're all fat and happy with their Barstool hats and cover model playthings and blogging. I'm not saying that they're not doing a good job- because they more or less are- but I miss the way Barstool was back before anyone had any idea who the hell we were.
Enough is enough.
I'm bringing back the anger. I'm bringing back the hatred. I'm bringing back the shoot first, ask questions later ethos that made this paper something special. I'm bringing back the old school Barstool Sports that looked around Boston and saw nothing but enemies.
Boston Dirt Dogs will make you retarded.
There I said it. If you read Boston Dirt Dogs with any sort of regularity…actually, strike that. Where "read" is, insert the phrase "stumble onto." It should now read: If you stumble onto Boston Dirt Dogs with any sort of regularity, you are probably suffering from some sort of chromosomal boo-boo and may want to think about doing some Photoshop work for their site.
Dirt Dogs is somehow still around. It makes no sense. I don't want to keep them in business one second longer but if you have a second today, check out the site. Just humor me. Shortly before I started writing this, I checked out Dirt Dogs to see what exciting Boston.com articles they had decided to link to and this is what I found- a picture of The Sopranos at Holsteins with a random Manny Ramirez image pasted on.
Here's the caption- In the alternate ending to The Sopranos, ultimately cut by writer David Chase, Manny Ramirez emerges from under the table to warn A.J. that a gunman is about to open fire on the family.
What the hell does that even mean? I feel like I need to be brain damaged to find the humor in that.
And that Manny/Sorpanos photo was the highlight of the day at Dirt Dogs. Which isn't saying much because Dirt Dogs had only one other post today (6/11/07). It consisted of one AP photo and the following random grouping of words that probably took at least 30-seconds to throw together:
It's the Third Loss in a Row for Hype-K
But It's Timlin That Really Throws It Away
Sox Stumble at Chase, 5-1
Same Old R.J., Unfortunately
Dice-K Walks Costly Again
Daisuke Mediocre: Is He Quickly Becoming a .500 pitcher?
Julio Lugo is Killing Us
Yankees Just 9 1/2 Back
"I just threw it away. Bad error. There's really no excuse."-- 6.10.07, Mike 'Not Ready for Prime Time' Timlin
That's it. In one day, Boston Dirt Dogs produced a grammar school Photoshop picture of Manny and the Sopranos and around 70 words about the Red Sox. Oh, there was a hyperlink back to the Boston.com page that links to Dirt Dogs. That's what I call a job well done. Someone give those guys some Pudding Pops and a pat on the back.
What is the point of this? There are approximately 500 websites that provide better Red Sox coverage than Dirt Dogs and yet somehow these are the guys that Boston.com does business with? I can only imagine that Dirt Dogs is paying Boston.com and not the other way around because if Boston.com is somehow paying the guys at Dirt Dogs, then The Globe has bigger problems than their nose-diving circulation numbers.
Maybe it's just sympathy or pity and Boston.com is just too nice to tell Dirt Dogs to go away. Or maybe it's just some sort of inside joke at Boston.com and all the people over there are laughing their asses off at the guys that can't think of anything else to do all day except Photoshop Manny Ramirez into a Sopranos photo.
But for the life of me, I don't get it.
I think Boston.com should do a little test. Remove the Dirt Dogs link from Boston.com for a few weeks and monitor the site's traffic then. Sure, Dirt Dogs was once relevant. But that was a long, long time ago. Does Boston.com really need a property that manages to churn out 70 words and one bad Photoshop in a 24 hour period? Does any online media company? Would anyone actually visit Dirt Dogs if it wasn't linked on Boston.com?
I doubt it. You have 500 better Red Sox-related sites to visit but instead you choose the one with (A) no actual writing (B) no links to any sites other than their Boston.com overlords and Bill Simmons Lite, a.k.a Kevin Hench, a former Dirt Dogger, and (C) a picture of Jimmy Fallon. Yeah, that sounds plausible.
Boston.com, do the right thing. Take Dirt Dogs out behind the bunkhouse, pull out the pistol that Carlson gave you and put it out of its misery. It's old and smelly and stinking up the whole Internet.